Derby Day

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The state of German non-league football?

Simply stick to Erkenschwick

...or as Goscinny didn't say: All of the Recklinghausen disctrict is under Schalke's control, except for one small village of indomitables that still holds out against the Royal Blues.

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Rudi Assauer: Fading memories of my life

"There are artificial knees, new hip joints, while others enjoy life with a cardiac pacemaker. But the head. The bonce. It can't come worse."

— Rudi Assauer, 2011

The last time I saw Rudi Assauer at a local gas station, he was like a goddamn boss. As always. Smoking one of his trademark cigars (at a gas station!) he carried a huge stack of newspapers under his arm as he headed to his limousine. What means that he still was interested in current affairs and also was able to get things done on his own. This happened less than two years ago.

The 67-year-old, however, then already had to deal with difficulties to articulate himself and occasional blackouts over the last few years. These problems were probably one of the reasons for his inglorious retirement as Schalke manager in 2006 and rumours that he might be an alcoholic one year earlier.

In 2010 Assauer finally underwent an examination at a specialty hospital in Essen. Sad diagnosis: Alzheimer's disease. Since then his condition has deteriorated significantly. He had to give up driving and was constrained to sell his villa and move to his daughter subsequently. But Rudi has always been a fighter and so he started to take the bull by the horns. As a consequence he allowed public-service TV broadcaster ZDF to follow him for about a year and wrote down his memoirs with support of sportswriter Patrick Strasser.

"Wie ausgewechselt: Verblassende Erinnerungen an mein Leben" (English: "Like having been substituted: Fading memories of my life") was published yesterday, February 2nd 2012.

Wish him all the best!

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Senior career stats:
1963–1964 SpVgg Herten 24 (3)
1964–1970 Borussia Dortmund 119 (8)
1970–1976 SV Werder Bremen 188 (4)

Honours as player:
DFB-Pokal: 1964–65 (with Borussia Dortmund)
UEFA Cup Winners' Cup: 1965–66 (with Borussia Dortmund)

Managing career:
1976–1981 SV Werder Bremen
1981–1986 FC Schalke 04
1990–1993 VfB Oldenburg
1993–2006 FC Schalke 04

Honours as manager:
UEFA Cup: 1996–97 (with Schalke 04)
DFB-Pokal: 2000–01 & 2001–02 (with Schalke 04)

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Raúl: Goal of the Year / Tor des Jahres 2011

Raúl's wondergoal against 1. FC Köln earlier this season has officially been selected as "Tor des Jahres 2011" by viewers of the "ARD-Sportschau" (Bundesliga TV show). ¡Felicitaciones!

Now sit back, relax, and enjoy:

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One-Way Rivalry

Neither inner-city opponents like Union Berlin or TeBe nor Energie Cottbus from provincial Brandenburg are considered to be Hertha BSC's main rivals. No, this iffy honour dues Schalke 04.

What is particularly astonishing for various reasons. First of all, Gelsenkirchen is about 320 miles away and really no one there seems to give a shit about Berlin or Hertha. The capital club are perceived as an Bundesliga competitor just like the rest of the league. Nothing more, nothing less.

And then, what are we to think about a rivalry which is allegedly based on two incidents in the 60s and 70s while keeping in mind that a majority of Herthas's following exist only since 1997. Even in the 90s, they had gates of 3,000 and lower.

To cut a long story short: Sounds not very authentic to me.

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Informer, you no say that's who I'm gonna blame

Beef!

Clemens Tönnies, chief executive of Schalke's supervisory board, is notorious for his liability to populism. For a couple of years now, the meat industrialist prefers to attend the annual Revierderby in Dortmund with fellow supporters on the terrace.

Last week's meeting has seen the odd smoke and fireworks coming from the away end. Too much for Tönnies, 55, who instantly started to take photos of the troublemakers with his smartphone.

"All reasonable fans should declare their solidarity against these lone perpetrators and expose them with photos so we can file them. These people have to leave our stadia," Tönnies told a newspaper on Wednesday.

Well, Clemens, literally: If you can't stand the heat, stay in your VIP box.

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